I was dealt a bad deck of cards…

Death and I always wind up in the same room but we never speak, we only eye one another wearily.

Our interactions are akin to that of seeing an ex, or an old friend you had a falling out with but keep running into at the most inopportune moments. Every time I see her I want to say something, but its always the wrong moment, the wrong time, there’s too much pain or I’m not seeing clearly.

I wonder if one day she’ll speak up? Perhaps we only run into one another so frequently because there simply is not enough room left? She’s been everywhere and so have I. The world is a small place when you truly think about it, and in just eight hours you could be on the other side of it.

The fact that Death and I can never seem to discuss these things makes me sad. I’d like to know if she’s lonely, is that why she keeps taking people away from me and from the people I love? Does she stop by so frequently so that we can remember why we are alive? Or how fragile life really is, the line between life and death isn’t very thick, its just busy.

I am at a point in my life where I think I am truly losing it, but does that mean that something good will come of this?

Afterall, whatever doesn’t kill you simply makes you stronger.

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~ by volatilestructure on March 11, 2009.

3 Responses to “I was dealt a bad deck of cards…”

  1. When I first read your post I was concerned, but I saw that you used the major arcana card Strength to illustrate this post.

    To me using that card indicates that you know the answer to the question “will something good come of this?”

    Thank you for the opportunity to again reflect on one of life’s mysteries.

  2. You know the age old saying calm before the storm, I honestly believe it is the wrong way round, and there is always a storm before the calm. Life tends to get way to erratic and uncontrollable, before some epiphany.

  3. i strongly believe that whatever youre put through, you can make it through. its in your power. but many people abuse that power. i love this post. the strength card is one of my favorites because the woman in it has a familiar. often i see the lion as this sort of salvation or beacon of light she finds. for she must take care of the lion as the lion protects her. that is not only love but unity and trust.

    though i do not know why Death takes away those we love or care about the most, i do know that nothing comes easy and everything comes close.

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